I would have never really called myself a Lady Gaga fan, that is until her 2025 album Mayhem was released. I’m not sure why I even gave it a chance, as there has never been a Lady Gaga album that has captured my ears. Boy am I glad that I opened up my mind enough to listen, like a high school kid taking acid and not knowing how powerful of a drug it is. That high school kid might have been me. I prefer the Lady Gaga present day version of opening my mind to that horrific acid trip, though it is a pretty damn good story. Anyways…

I don’t need to introduce Lady Gaga to you. She’s a fucking icon. I do need to introduce her album Mayhem though. It is in my never humble opinion the greatest pop record EVER MADE. How dare I, you ask? Well, I think a great pop record should be evaluated on how many radio hit singles could be spawned from it. The majority of pop records are lucky to get 1-2 hits. I swear on my 8-pack abs (drop a comment if you want my ab workout) that there are at least 10 songs on here that could be smashes on the radio, and that sound great with or without mass media pushing them. 

The first track that really caught my ear was “Blade of Grass”. It’s also the least played song on the album according to Spotify. I swear people cannot be trusted when it comes to music, or anything. It’s an eye-moistening ballad that radiates  depths of love rarely felt by humans. After seeing her live, I’m not even sure that she can be called a human. Of course she didn’t play “Blade of Grass” live, and I blame her stupid fucking fans, or “monsters” as they call them. Monster dipshits would have ruined my night, if Ms. Gaga wasn’t so incredible in person. I’m going to skip over the album for the most part, and just insist that you give it a listen for yourself. It’s concert time.

I managed to score basically front row seats for a pretty low price. Don’t ask me how, I’ll never tell. Near the front row I was sandwiched between an uber gay guy and a plus-sized woman, which seemed to be a good chunk of the Lady Gaga crowd, though I also saw some gorgeous vixens that made my brain go gaga. Now onto the concert itself…

The stage itself was insane. There was this giant structure that filled the stage that looked like some type of European gothic architecture, and there were several spaces cut out for people to fit into. Lady Gaga came out on this giant plush red cushioned thing that had a giant birdcage structure hidden underneath it. This was just the start. The set pieces were constantly changing, as were her outfits. There were about 20 dancers who joined her doing insane dance moves, and a band that did these crazy interludes that were almost Death Grips-esque. Super dark and atmospheric, that had nothing to do with a Lady Gaga type crowd. She also broke the performance into 4 acts/chapters. Each one was wild. 

Theatrics aside, let’s talk about Lady Gaga. We all know she can sing, but man, can she sing! Her voice is unreal. There’s a section where she just does ballads while playing the piano, and that alone was worth the steep price of admission. Then she’s dancing all over the place for the whole 2 hour show and running around changing costumes. I almost felt bad for her, until I remembered she’s probably making a million dollars for each show or something. 

And she’s worth every fucking penny let me tell ya. If you missed this tour, I feel truly sorry for you. I’ve seen damn near everyone live, and nobody has come close to this, as I don’t think there’s anyone who can match her combination of raw talent, art direction, and discography in pop music. Though that new Kanye SoFi stadium show looked bananas, but Kanye is just rapping, while Lady Gaga is singing her heart out, dancing like an expert, and changing outfits seemingly every 5 minutes. Lady Gaga wins. 

I think she’s doing one more show in New York. Fly out if you can. I guess that makes a monster now, even though I was always one deep down…